Since I can remember, I have always been a man that values family. The Lord designed me this way. Even as a child, I longed for the holidays to roll around so that the family could gather. At those gatherings, I recall all of the laughter and chatter of our family - and I recall sharing the moments at gatherings, collectively, that made life meaningful. Those moments made family special.
As I have grown up, my love for family has certainly remained; however, my understanding of what it means to love family has certainly been forced to mature through extremely difficult moments and challenging relationship-dynamics.
We all learn that there really isn’t a “how-to manual” for family members to read, so, apart from the persevering and proving Truth of Scripture, we all are just relating to one another based on what feels good and right to ourselves through the given exchanges and situations. It is our feelings that often serve as the binding in these relationships and the offenses that define how we relate to each other.
Highland, our feelings, preferences or offenses should not be the binding we use for our family. We must use God's Word as our glue; submitting to Scripture as to how we maintain our household. We cannot use scripture simply for the purposes of making our points or defending our “right-positions” - we must, rather, allow God’s Word to shape and sharpen us at difficult junctures and through every season of our time together.
This past Sunday, we looked at one of the most defining parts of Scripture, as it relates to how we are to conduct ourselves as family - both in our homes and at Highland.
As we highlighted, the book of Ruth is an account of a family who lived through a very difficult season. Their family took as hard a hit as any family could imagine. During the time of the Judges, Ruth was a Moabite woman who married a man from Israel.
Ruth and her family all lived in Moab. Over a span of time, Ruth’s father-n-law dies, leaving behind Naomi, who is Ruth’s mother-n-law. Not long after, Ruth’s husband dies and his brother, who was married to Orpah. So now, Naomi, Ruth and Orpah live in Moab as widows, alone. On top of that, there is a famine that has stricken the land!
So, Naomi makes a plan to return to Israel to reconnect with her family. She attempts to release both of her daughter-in-laws. Orpah decides to depart, but Ruth then, makes an unwavering declaration of faithfulness. Compelled by the Lord, Ruth declares Naomi’s God will be her God and that Naomi’s people will be her people.
And so, they journey back to Israel together. Upon being welcomed back, Naomi describes herself as being consumed with bitterness. But despite her feelings of bitterness, the Lord’s mercy prevails and He begins a work of generational redemption.
Now, Highland-family, what we see here in Ruth is that Ruth is not sharing in the glee and security of family relationships, she is committing herself to share in the bitterness of her family - to love, to care for and long-suffer as she needs to. That is family - bringing the joy of the Lord into a bitter family situation and defending the vulnerable, while representing truth to the deceived.
Here are a few ways we can cultivate the joy of the Lord in our hearts and home - especially when bitterness looms:
Turn every critical thought that arises about that person into a directive for how to pray for that person (2 Corinthians 10:4-5).
By so doing, we do not allow a stronghold of Satan to form against us, instead the Holy Spirit continues to command our hearts, even through the bitterness of that relationship - and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.
Allow your heart and home to foster grace, not gossip (Galatians 5:13-15).
When we foster back-biting in our hearts through speaking poisonous counsel to ourselves about how to handle those who are bitter, then our minds weaponize our thoughts against that person we are harboring bitterness toward. When we foster grace through the Holy Spirit, we promote undeserved forgiveness toward that person, just as we have received through Jesus.
The Fruitfulness of Faithfulness is Forever
Like Ruth, as we remain faithful to the Lord throughout our generation to honor the name of our Lord, we see the Lord prove faithful. Through Ruth’s declaration of faithfulness, the Lord grafts her into His redemptive plan of salvation. Let us focus on the fruitfulness of faithfulness, not frivolous squabbles in our lives.
“Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay. You make known to me the path of life you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand” (Psalm 16:5-11).
The reason we want to turn our attention to the fruitfulness of faithfulness is because these are are the words of Ruth’s great-grandson, David.
I love you, Highland,
Rob